What to Do If You Feel Like Blaming God for Something

I think it would be right to say that it is common for Christians to feel like blaming God for things. Sometimes sufferings arise in our lives that we just don’t understand, and it is easy to feel unhappy with God as a result.

A little technique to use

I think if we feel like blaming God for something, it is helpful to do the following.

Imagine that Jesus, the God-Man, is sitting with you. And imagine that He is there to defend how He has treated you. In other words, imagine that He is speaking to you, explaining exactly why you have suffered the things that have made you upset with Him.

In His infinite wisdom, He would know exactly how to convince you that He hasn’t treated you badly.

You know that He would succeed in convincing you of this, don’t you? You don’t really think, do you, that if Jesus were trying to defend how He has treated you, He would fail to persuade you?

Deep down every Christian surely knows that this is true. If the Lord Jesus were to give a defence of how He has treated any of us, a defence tailor-made to what each of us can understand, what He said would be totally compelling. We would be sitting open-mouthed, amazed at how perfectly He had defended everything He had done to us and let us go through. We would see crystally clearly that He had not treated us badly and that what we had suffered made sense.

Of course, when we do feel like blaming God, Jesus isn’t actually sitting down with us, talking to us face to face. But what we need to do is accept by faith that His defence of how He has treated us would be totally convincing. Deep inside we know it’s true. So, walking by faith and not by sight (2 Cor 5:7), we need to decide that we are going to trust His wisdom even if we can’t physically see and hear Him defend how He has treated us.

Blaming God is a sin

Although it is common for Christians to feel like blaming God, we need to be clear that blaming Him for anything is a sin. He is morally perfect and totally blameless in every way.

It is true that, when we are suffering, God wants us to tell Him all about how we feel. This means that if we feel blame towards Him, we should be honest and say this. We must always be one hundred per cent honest with Him about everything.

Of course, He won’t be shocked or even surprised by what we say. He already knows how we feel in every detail. But it is good for us to express our feelings to Him in this way.

Nevertheless, a Christian should never remain for an extended period of time with feelings of blame towards God. We know that blaming Him doesn’t make sense. Deep down we know that how He has treated us in no way conflicts with His goodness.

The example of David

Instead of blaming God for things in our lives, we do very well to follow the lead of David as seen in the Psalms.

When David was suffering, he poured out his heart to God. He pleaded with Him. But he stopped short of blaming Him. He never went so far as to actually say that God was to blame for anything.

For example, in Psalm 13:1-2 David says:

‘How long, O LORD? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me? How long must I take counsel in my soul and have sorrow in my heart all the day? How long shall my enemy be exalted over me?’ (ESV)

It is true that at first sight, when David uses the words ‘Will you forget me forever?’ he seems to be blaming God for forgetting him. But it would be a mistake to take this too literally. This question needs to be interpreted in the light of verses 5-6, which end the Psalm:

‘But I have trusted in your steadfast love; my heart shall rejoice in your salvation. I will sing to the LORD, because he has dealt bountifully with me.’ (ESV)

We could perhaps say that in this Psalm David gets close to blaming God. We could maybe even say, because he was sinful like we are, that he experienced some feelings of blame towards God. But he stops short of actually blaming Him. He is expressing His frustration in a very vivid way. But he doesn’t go so far as to blame the Lord.

Summing up

The next time you feel like blaming God for something you have suffered or are still suffering, I would encourage you to do what I have suggested.

Imagine that Jesus is sitting down with you for the express purpose of defending how He has treated you, that He isn’t in a hurry, and that His defence is going to be tailor-made for what you are able to understand.

You know He would succeed, don’t you? You know you would become completely convinced that He hasn’t treated you badly.

So make a decision to accept this by faith. Apologise to God for blaming Him for anything, renounce the feelings of blame, and praise Him that He is with you to help you. And remember too that on the cross Jesus suffered more than you can imagine and that it was for you.

 

See also:

Some Things for Christians to Do When They Are Hanging On by Their Fingernails

Trusting God When We Are Not Sure What to Do 

How and Why Should Christians Rejoice? 

Taking Heart from the Apostle Paul’s Experiences of Setbacks and Failed Plans

Is It Right for Christians to Name and Claim Things in Faith?

Sometimes you will hear Christians speak approvingly of using a principle of ‘Name it and claim it’ when praying for things. They say that it is good Christian practice often to name something before God in prayer and claim the answer in faith.

It is also quite common to hear Christians speak disapprovingly of naming and claiming things in faith. They say that Christian prayer should not be like this and that it encourages believers to selfishly treat God like some sort of vending machine.

So who has got this right? Should we name and claim things in faith or shouldn’t we?

I would suggest that the principle of naming things before God and claiming them in faith is a good and biblical one, although it is important not to misunderstand this kind of prayer and to see its limitations.

Actually, although the principle of naming and claiming is a good one, because the precise label ‘Name it and claim it’ tends to be connected quite closely to the mistaken teaching that is known as the ‘Prosperity Gospel’, I think we do better to avoid using this label itself. But the basic principle is a good one generally as far as prayer is concerned.

Mark 11:24

An important verse on this topic is Mark 11:24, where Jesus teaches:

‘Whatever things you pray and ask for, believe that you have received them, and they will be yours.’

Here Jesus commands His followers to claim things in faith when praying. He is encouraging us to go boldly to God and say, ‘Lord, I ask You to do x, y and z, and I believe that You are going to do them.’

Jesus actually uses a past tense – ‘you have received’ – instead of a future – ‘you will receive’ – but the idea is that the person praying is so confident of receiving the answer in the future that it is as if they have already received it.

Although, as I have said, we do better to avoid the label ‘Name it and claim it’, Jesus is clearly encouraging us in this verse to treat prayer in this sort of way.

This only applies to things that are the will of God

It is interesting to note that although Mark 11:24 mentions the condition of believing/faith for a prayer to be answered, nothing is said about the condition of asking for something that is the will of God.

Importantly, however, language generally, as well as biblical language, often expects the reader to understand unexpressed conditions that are treated as obvious. And it should be obvious that Jesus means us to understand that this promise of God answering our prayers asked in faith only applies to prayers that are for things that are the will of God. If something isn’t the will of God, Jesus’ words certainly don’t apply.

So, for example, suppose that a certain Christian is somehow deceived into believing sincerely that God wants to give him a red Ferrari, although this is not the will of God at all. So he prays for this, genuinely expecting to receive it.

Will God give it to him? Absolutely not! Jesus’ words in this verse are in no way saying that God is somehow obligated to answer a prayer that is against His will, just because a Christian happens to wrongly think that it is His will.

Mistakes of those who approve of naming and claiming

There is no doubt that some Christians who say they approve of naming and claiming things in faith do try to abuse this principle for selfish gain. They have failed to understand that the approach to prayer outlined in passages like Mark 11:24 is essentially not about getting God to give us things we like (although that will happen sometimes) but about being involved in God’s work of building His church.

It isn’t that Christians are supposed to call the shots and get God to fit in with our prayers. Rather, we are supposed to claim things in faith that glorify God and advance His work in the world. It should be all about Him, not us.

Mistakes of those who disapprove of naming and claiming

On the other side, some Christians who say they disapprove of naming and claiming things in faith seem to throw the baby out with the bath water.

By all means, let us avoid the approach of those who want to abuse prayer for selfish gain. But let us be crystal clear too that the Bible contains passages like Mark 11:24 that teach us to name and claim things in faith, even if we avoid that exact label.

Here is the verse again:

‘Whatever things you pray and ask for, believe that you have received them, and they will be yours.’

Note how this verse contains not just a suggestion for how we should pray but a command. And there is not the slightest doubt that this command applies just as much to Christians living today as it did in the days of Jesus’ earthly ministry. It’s not optional for us to do this. It is the way that the Lord Himself has instructed us to pray.

 

See also:

Every Christian Should Be a Prayer Information Hub

Getting the Balance between Expecting Too Little and Too Much from Prayer

Christians Need to Put Everything to the Test

Fighting Tooth and Nail to Interpret the Bible Honestly

The Importance of Being God-Reliant Rather Than Self-Reliant

As a general rule, the world is clearly very impressed by people who are self-reliant. Everywhere we look, we can find this attitude being praised and admired.

For example, there are many films that make self-reliance one of the key qualities of the hero or heroine. The audience are encouraged to think highly of and even idolise characters who can manage on their own and don’t need anyone else’s help.

The same attitude can often be found in music too. Take, for instance, the well-known song by Sister Sledge, ‘We Are Family’. This song includes the line:

‘Have faith in you and the things you do. You won’t go wrong.’

In the eyes of the vast majority of people, you could hardly find a more innocent and uncontroversial lyric as this.

Or how many times, in all sorts of contexts, have you heard a person say to someone else, ‘Believe in yourself’?

This is meant to be seen as positive encouragement that no one would disagree with.

God’s way is very different

As so often, however, the Christian way is very different from the world’s way. In fact, it is difficult to overstate how wrong self-reliance is. To be self-reliant is actually to fail completely to live as a human being should live. It is a million miles from how God designed us to be.

In reality, God made us to be completely dependent on Him for everything, to be constantly looking to Him for help and direction. We are creatures, under the hand and under the authority of our Creator who loves us, and we need to recognise that this is our place. Instead of being self-reliant, we should be God-reliant in whatever we do.

Biblical passages against self-reliance

The tone of the whole Bible is against self-reliance, even if this is not always made explicit. However, there are also many passages which more plainly show us how wrong it is.

For example, in Jeremiah 17:5 God says:

‘Cursed is the man who trusts in man and makes flesh his strength, whose heart turns away from the LORD.’ (ESV)

In this verse God doesn’t just say that it is a mistake to have the attitude of self-reliance. He says that someone who does this is cursed! This is pretty blunt, isn’t it?

Or take John 15:5, where Jesus tells us:

‘Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing.’ (ESV)

With these words, Jesus makes it clear that self-reliance is going to be fruitless as far as doing things for Him is concerned.

Similarly, in 2 Corinthians 12:9 the apostle Paul refers to an occasion when Jesus said to him:

‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ (ESV)

And then in the next verse he remarks:

‘For when I am weak, then I am strong.’ (ESV)

To be in a position of weakness is a far cry from any form of self-reliance.

This list of Bible passages could be continued at length.

Doing everything with Jesus

In order to become more God-reliant and less self-reliant, one thing we can do is make it our goal to do everything we do with Jesus. I don’t just mean that we should try to tackle every problem we encounter with the Lord’s help. I mean that we should aim to treat everything we do as a joint venture with Him, whether or not there is anything difficult about it.

That is not to say that we should try to be constantly conscious in our minds of doing everything with the Lord. I think that would be unrealistic and would probably be exhausting. I just mean that deeper down, in our spirits, we should attempt to rest constantly in Him and do everything we do with Him.

Believing that we can do what God enables us to do

Despite all I have said so far, there is a sense in which sometimes Christians need to believe that they can do more than they think.

For example, there are times when God has given a Christian a gift, but this person wrongly thinks that they are not able to do what they are actually able to do. They then need to be encouraged to believe that they are able to do it.

But this is very different from self-reliance. This is really about understanding what God has done in us, and how He can work through us.

 

See also:

Getting into the Habit of Doing Everything with Jesus

The Gravity of the Sin of Pride

Trusting God When We Are Not Sure What to Do

The Radical Nature of the Normal Christian Life

Why Do We Not See More Miracles Today?

It is surely true that a growing number of Christians worldwide are accepting that God works miracles today. In fact, I think it would probably be right to say that a large majority of genuine, born-of-the-Spirit believers now agree on this point. 

And so they should. Firstly, the idea that miracles ceased with the apostles in the first century fits very poorly with biblical teaching. And secondly, there is abundant testimony of miracles in our day from many parts of the world. 

For a defence of the position that God works miracles today, see my article: God Wants to Use Christians in Miracle Work Today. 

More miracles in some places than others 

Although God is performing miracles, it is surely true that He is doing so in some parts of the world more frequently than in others. And it is also true that in any given part of the world, miracles occur much more commonly in some Christian circles than in others. 

So why is this? Why is there such variation in the amount of miracle work? 

I don’t pretend to have all the answers to this question. Miracles are almost by definition mysterious and beyond full human comprehension. I certainly don’t want to give an overconfident and simplistic formula that will supposedly lead to an automatic increase in the number of miracles. 

Nevertheless, I am sure that there are some mistakes that Christians often make, which reduce the number of miracles that are performed. And I want to say something about these. 

Unbelief 

First of all, unbelief is deadly in stifling the miracle-working power of God. 

We read about an example of this in Matthew 13:53-58, where we are told what happened one time the Lord Jesus went to His home village. Verse 58 says: 

‘And He did not do many miracles there because of their unbelief.’ 

Matthew is explicit that unbelief was the reason for the lack of miracle work. 

We should also take account of what Jesus teaches in Mark 11:24: 

‘Therefore I tell you, whatever things you pray and ask for, believe that you have received them, and they will be yours.’ 

Again, we see how important believing is. And Jesus implies that without the believing we should not expect to receive the things we ask for. 

That’s not to say that there can be no exceptions to this. The Lord doesn’t say that prayers will never, ever be answered without faith. But He certainly implies that no faith will usually mean no positive answer. 

Today, similarly, if the Christians in a place have been deceived into believing that God doesn’t want to do miracles there, it is very unlikely that they will occur. Unbelief is a terrible, highly contagious thing that acts like a fire extinguisher on the power of the Holy Spirit. 

Not asking 

Second, if Christians are not asking God to perform miracles, it is unlikely that He will work much in this way. 

We do well to remember what Jesus says in Matthew 7:7: 

‘Ask and it will be given to you. Seek and you will find. Knock and it will be opened to you.’ 

This is a general principle of the Christian life that applies to praying for various things, and these things certainly sometimes include miracles. 

James also teaches along the same lines in James 4:2, where he tells his readers: 

‘You do not have, because you do not ask.’ 

Again, this is a general principle that applies to failing to pray for a variety of things, and these things surely at times include miracles. 

A little later in his letter, in James 5:16-17, James says more about prayer: 

‘16 So confess your sins to each other, and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of an upright person is powerful and effective. 17 Elijah was a person with a nature like ours, and he prayed earnestly that it would not rain, and it did not rain on the land for three years and six months.’ 

Firstly, note how in v. 16 James instructs his readers, and by implication later Christians, to pray for healing miracles. 

Note too how in v. 17 James says approvingly that Elijah prayed ‘earnestly’. When we pray, we should do likewise. We should look God right in the centre of His eye and commit fully to everything we ask. 

I am sure that in many parts of the world, and in many churches, miracles are not happening much because the Christians are either not asking God for miracles at all, or they are not asking Him earnestly enough. Usually things don’t just fall into our laps, but we have to fervently seek them from the Lord. 

Not seeking to be used in miracle work 

Third, if Christians are not seeking to be used by God as agents of miracle work, it is unlikely that many will occur. 

Some Christians seem to have the idea that if God wants to work miracles, then He will do them on His own without using a human agent. 

It is true that the Lord does sometimes perform miracles without a human agent, and the Bible has examples of this. However, Scripture strongly implies that, at least after the day of Pentecost referred to in Acts 2, His usual method has been to use a human agent (e.g., Acts 3:1-8; 5:12; 6:8; 8:6; 9:17-18; 9:32-34, 39-41; 19:11-12; 20:9-10; 28:8-9; 1 Cor 12:9-10, 28-29; 2 Cor 12:12). 

There is no good reason for thinking that God’s way of doing things is any different today. His standard procedure is still to use human agents in miracle work. So not only should we pray that He would perform miracles, but we should also seek to be used personally in miracle work, just as Paul instructs us to do in 1 Corinthians 14:1. 

Tolerating sin 

Fourth, if sin is tolerated in a church, it is likely that the amount of miracle work will decrease. Or, if that church is not currently performing any miracles, tolerating sin will make it more unlikely that miracle work will begin. 

Sin and the Holy Spirit don’t mix, so the more sin is allowed to exist unchallenged, the more the Spirit is likely to back off from performing miracles in and through that Christian community. 

Of course, this doesn’t mean that the Christians in a church need to be anything like morally perfect before God will use them. It does mean, however, that if a blind eye is being turned to sin, if there is no discipline of those who fall into sin, etc., miracles will be less likely. 

Wrong ideas about qualifications for miracle work 

Fifth, Christians often go wrong by thinking that God wouldn’t call them personally to work miracles, because they are not outstanding in any way. They suppose that they are too weak and ordinary. 

This attitude is badly mistaken, as Paul makes clear in 1 Corinthians 1:27-29: 

‘27 But God has chosen the foolish things of the world to put the wise to shame; God has chosen the weak things of the world to put the things that are strong to shame; 28 God has chosen the insignificant things of the world and the despised things, the things that are not, to bring to nothing the things that are, 29 so that no one may boast before God.’ 

It is true that Christians might sometimes need to get things sorted out in their lives or reach a certain level of spiritual maturity before being granted big gifts. But nevertheless, being weak and being ordinary are themselves excellent qualifications for ministry. 

When a Christian wrongly thinks that they are too weak or ordinary to work miracles, this naturally leads to unbelief and to a lack of seeking to be used as an agent in miracle work, which in turn prevent miracles, as I outlined above. 

Seeking miracles from God 

The five issues I have mentioned seem to be some major reasons why we don’t see more miracles today. 

Those of us who have never been used by God in miracle work should pray that He would lead us into this area of ministry if He desires. For some, it may be appropriate to seek out Christians who are experienced in such matters, those we feel we can trust, to ask for their guidance. 

Regardless of whether we are ever used in this way ourselves, however, we should all be looking to the Lord to perform miracles in the places where we live. In some places, getting the breakthrough might not be easy, but then perseverance is called for. In other places, miracles might be just around the corner if the Christians there will only ask. 

 

See also: 

God Wants to Use Christians in Miracle Work Today 

The Importance of Ministering to People Afflicted by Demons 

In the Early Church How Often Did Non-Apostles Work Miracles? 

Is It Always God’s Will to Heal Christians?

Trusting God When We Are Not Sure What to Do

I once heard a Christian woman I know say: 

‘From now on, I am not going to make any big decision in my life until I am 100 per cent sure of what God wants me to do.’ 

I have huge respect for this woman. She is a very devout follower of Jesus and a great example to others. 

What is more, when she said this, there was a lot about her attitude that was absolutely right. She was determined to do the will of God in her life. And in faith she was expecting Him to speak to her and guide her. 

God certainly can and does speak to His children clearly at times, sometimes extremely clearly. It is not uncommon for Christians who have earnestly sought God about something to become sure of His will.

Nevertheless, I believe that what my friend said on this occasion was unrealistic. Even the most sincere Christians find themselves at times having to make big decisions without being certain of God’s will. And that is not usually a sign that anything has gone wrong. 

What Paul says in 1 Corinthians 

In 1 Corinthians 13:9-12 the apostle Paul says to the church in Corinth: 

‘For we know in part and we prophesy in part. But when what is complete comes, what is partial will be done away with. 

When I was a child, I used to speak like a child, think like a child, reason like a child. When I became a man, I did away with childish things. For now we see indistinctly in a mirror, but then we will see face to face. Now I know in part, but then I will know fully just as I have also been fully known.’ 

Paul talks here about the reality of the Christian life on this earth. He says that we only know things in part. He also likens our insight at the present time to that of a child, who doesn’t understand things very well. The Greek word he uses, nepios, refers to a very young child. Paul also says that we see indistinctly as if we are looking in a mirror. In his day mirrors were made of polished metal and gave a rather hazy image. 

In this passage Paul seems to be making two overlapping points about Christian experience. 

First, he is saying that we only see part of the picture of what God does. 

And second, he appears to be saying that even in some of the bits we can see, we will have uncertainty about what we are actually seeing. This fits well with the image of seeing indistinctly in a mirror. 

What Paul says here would seem to apply in part to the ways in which God leads individual Christians. When seeking His will on things, it is normal Christian experience for us often to feel that we have gaps in our understanding. And it is also normal for us often to be uncertain about things. When we die or Jesus returns, we will see the whole picture clearly, but we can’t do that yet. 

I am not saying that we should resign ourselves to always being uncertain of God’s will. That would be going too far. But to think that we should always be able to reach a place where we are 100 per cent sure of His will about important decisions we make is to go to the other extreme. This idea fits poorly with what Paul says in this passage. 

So, it is normal experience for devout Christian people to make big decisions at times without being certain that they are doing God’s will. But how do we deal with this? How do we cope with the prospect of making a big decision that could possibly be outside His will? 

Well, to begin with, we need to know that we have done everything we can to hear what He is saying. So we must take every possible step to discover His will. This will involve the following: 

Prayer 

It should be obvious that when we are confronted with a big decision, we need to soak it in a lot of prayer. And we should certainly not be praying alone. It is important that we ask other Christians to pray for us too. 

Asking others for advice 

No Christian has a monopoly on wisdom. It therefore makes sense to get the advice of some trusted fellow believers. This will often involve asking the leaders of the church we belong to for their input. And it is usually better to hear what several others have to say rather than going to just one person. 

Examining our consciences 

When faced with a big decision, we must also examine our consciences to the best of our ability. 

You will often hear Christian teachers talking about the dangers of introspection, i.e., looking inside ourselves. Many almost seem to treat any introspection at all as a kind of sin. 

It is true that some Christians spend too much time looking inside themselves, and this can cause problems. But it is perfectly healthy to look inside ourselves now and again to see what is going on. And when we are confronted with an important decision that we have to make, looking inside ourselves is really necessary. We should be trying to assess our motives and listen to what our consciences are telling us. 

In decision-making, the biggest dangers occur when we have a strong desire to take one course of action instead of another. If we don’t have much of a preference, then we are not in great danger of letting our desires cloud our judgment. But this can be a real danger when we really want or don’t want to do something. 

As we consider making the decision we are faced with, we must do our best to be as honest as possible about our desires and motivations. And we must choose to accept God’s will to the best of our ability. 

Not making the decision too soon 

We should also be careful not to make the decision any sooner than we have to. If a decision does not have to be made immediately, then we should make use of the time remaining to continue praying for insight into God’s will. 

For example, suppose a Christian has to decide whether to accept a job offer but they are unsure of God’s will. In this case there will probably be a date by which the offer needs to be accepted. And it is wise to delay making a decision until the time for making it runs out. That will give as much time as possible for things to become clear. 

In some big decisions we make, there will not be a specific date by which the decision must be made. In cases like these it is more difficult to know exactly how long we should keep seeking God’s will. But usually I think we can get a sense of when enough is enough. If we feel that we have really got as far as we can and our consciences are clear, then it is time for us to make our decision. 

Trusting God when we are uncertain 

Sometimes taking the above steps will be enough for us to become sure of God’s will. At other times, however, these things will not be enough, and we will still find that we are unsure. 

In such cases, we simply need to take the course of action that we think is most likely to be God’s will. And then we must trust Him for the future. 

If we have fought hard to find God’s will about a decision we need to make, He won’t be angry if we get it wrong. That is not His nature at all. And this means that He will be with us as we move into the future. And, because He is with us, we need not fear. 

In the Bible we find promises that God will remain with His children as they step into the future. Here are a few Old Testament examples: 

In Genesis 28:15 God promises Jacob: 

‘Listen! I am with you, and I will keep you wherever you go. And I will bring you back to this land. For I will not leave you until I have done what I have promised you.’ 

In Deuteronomy 31:6 Moses tells Israel: 

‘Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or tremble because of them, for the LORD your God is the one who is going with you. He will not fail you or abandon you.’ 

In Joshua 1:5, shortly after the death of Moses, God says to Joshua: 

‘Just as I have been with Moses, so I will be with you. I will not fail you or abandon you.’ 

Importantly, none of these promises was conditional on the recipients never making a mistake of any kind. As long as those who received the promises tried hard to do the will of God, He remained with them and overcame mistakes that they made. 

The New Testament continues the theme of God being with His children. 

In Matthew 28:20 Jesus promises the 11 apostles and, by implication, all later Christians: 

‘Mark My words. I am with you always, until the end of the age.’ 

And in Hebrews 13:5 the author reminds his Christian readers: 

‘He [God] has said, “I will never desert you and I will never abandon you.”’ 

Like the Old Testament promises that I cited, these promises are not conditional on us making no mistakes of any kind. If we make an honest mistake in an important decision, then God will be with us just as much as He was before. 

The key point I am trying to make is that we shouldn’t fear making wrong decisions about things. If we try hard to make the right decision but still get it wrong, God won’t distance Himself from us. We need to trust Him to take us forward from where we find ourselves. 

God is the master rerouter 

Those who have used a sat nav system when driving will probably have found that there are times when they have left the prescribed route. When this happens, the sat nav reroutes the driver so that they can get to their destination by another route. 

This rerouting by sat nav is very similar to what God often does when Christians make wrong decisions in their lives. He leads us back on to the right track by another route. The short term future will be different from what it would have been if we had not made the bad decision. But God can arrange things so that we are soon more or less back to where we would have been if we had made the right decision instead. 

Times when we should always expect to hear God clearly 

So far I have been saying that it is normal for devout Christians to make big decisions at times without being completely sure that they are doing the right thing. 

I do think, however, that some decisions are so huge that we should always expect God to warn us clearly about a course of action that is going to cause real problems. 

I am thinking especially about decisions to get married to someone. In this case, of course, if we make a mistake, it is not so simple to think that God can just do some rerouting. Marriage is for life. 

If a Christian is trying hard to do God’s will, I find it difficult to believe that He would allow them to enter into a bad marriage. 

Of course, I am not saying that God will abandon us if we do this. When we repent of sins, He will forgive us and take us forward from where we are. I am just saying that we should expect Him to speak to us clearly to warn against what would be a bad marriage. 

And the same goes for any similar decisions. When making an enormous, irreversible decision, we should always expect God to warn us clearly about a course of action that is going to lead to real problems. 

Nevertheless, as regards decisions that are somewhat less important but still significant, I believe it is normal for Christians sometimes to have uncertainty when making them. And if this is our experience, we need not fear. He will be with us as we step into the future. 

 

See also: 

Getting the Balance between Expecting Too Little and Too Much from Prayer 

The Importance of Learning All We Can from Sins and Mistakes 

Taking Heart from the Apostle Paul’s Experiences of Setbacks and Failed Plans 

Getting into the Habit of Doing Everything with Jesus

Some Things for Christians to Do When They Are Hanging On by Their Fingernails

I remember a time not that long ago when I met a good Christian friend of mine who was going through a very hard time. He told me that he was hanging on by his fingernails, and he asked me if I had any advice. 

Sadly, I didn’t have the answers that would solve his problems quickly. It was one of those occasions when I really wanted to help but I felt pretty powerless. 

Nevertheless, having had several times in my own Christian life when I have felt like I was hanging on by my fingernails, I was able to make some suggestions. 

Then I decided to write down what I said, in the hope that others might find what I said useful. Hence my words in what follows. 

So, if you are a Christian who is suffering badly at the moment, if you are hanging on by your fingernails for one reason or another, I would encourage you to do the following: 

Persevere 

First of all, never, ever give up. Keep on going until God comes to rescue you, which He will if you don’t give up. 

As you persevere, don’t set a time frame for when God will help you. If you can’t endure much more, He knows all about that and He will time things in a way that meets your need. 

Leave the details to God 

Don’t be overconfident about exactly how God is going to rescue you. He is enormously intelligent and wise, and there are probably thousands of different ways He could act. Leave all the details to Him. 

Repent 

Confess and repent of all sins you are aware of. If there are sins in your life that you know about but are making no attempt to address, then you can’t expect God to come and help you. 

If you are battling sins, that’s a very different matter. Sins that trouble you repeatedly and that you are fighting against won’t stop God coming to rescue you. 

That said, if you are struggling with sins of this kind, try to let other Christians know. Choose some people you can trust and tell them. Although these sins won’t stop God delivering you, they still need to be addressed, and help from others may be needed. 

Forgive 

Unforgiveness can be a block that prevents us receiving God’s help, so forgive anyone you have not yet forgiven. 

By forgiveness here, I mean rejecting and letting go of all bitterness towards people who have wronged you. I don’t mean that you must necessarily aim to have an obstacle-free relationship with people who have sinned against you but remain unrepentant. 

If the person who sinned is repentant, we should always aim to have an obstacle-free relationship with them. However, if the person is unrepentant, how we relate to them is a much more complicated matter. Nevertheless, it is never right to harbour feelings of bitterness towards anyone who has sinned against us, whether or not they are repentant for what they have done. 

If, after choosing to forgive, you find that you still feel bitterness towards someone, then use your will to reject those feelings to the best of your ability. If you are doing your best, any remaining feelings of bitterness will not stop God coming to rescue you in your suffering. 

Pray 

Persevere in prayer. Remember the parable of the widow and the judge in Luke 18:1-8. Think about how the widow, i.e., the Christian, kept on and on going to the judge, i.e., God, until she got what she asked for. Be like her in ‘pestering’ God to come and help you. 

When you pray, look the Lord right in the centre of His eye and commit fully to everything you ask. 

Pray fervently and often, but after finishing a time of prayer, don’t keep praying over and over worriedly. Instead, choose to leave the matter with God and don’t pray about it until the next prayer time. If it helps, use your arms and hands to symbolically hand over the problem to God, and then refuse to think about it for a while. 

Read the Bible 

Don’t neglect Scripture reading. 

Read the Psalms. See there how people of God before you have been hanging on by their fingernails. You’re not the first. 

Do a web search for ‘Bible verses in times of suffering’ or ‘Bible promises for help in times of suffering’ or something along these lines. Then meditate on what you read and claim any promises for yourself. 

Have faith 

Have faith that God will come to help you. 

If you find yourself doubting that He will, don’t worry. You only need faith smaller than the size of a mustard seed (Luke 17:6). Follow the example of the father of the demonised boy, whose faith was mixed with doubt and who said, ‘I do believe. Help my unbelief.’ (Mark 9:24). He got what he wanted. 

Don’t try to manufacture feelings of confidence. It’s impossible to do that. Just use your will to choose to accept that God will come to rescue you, even if you feel that He won’t. 

If you feel doubt and gloom about the future, go against your feelings by speaking words of faith. From time to time, speak words out loud to the Lord like: 

‘Lord, I believe that you will set me free from this situation.’ 

Then leave things with Him, including your doubts, and refuse to think about the problem for a while. 

Give thanks 

Give thanks to God for the good things in your life. Even when we are suffering badly, there are always positive things in our lives to thank Him for. 

For example, thank God for providing you with salvation, thank Him for the times in the past that He has helped you, thank Him for the people that love you. If you can see, thank Him for that. If you have food to eat today, thank Him for that. And so on. 

When thanking, don’t try to make yourself feel grateful. We should never try to manufacture feelings or emotions. 

If you don’t feel grateful to God, don’t worry. That won’t stop Him coming to rescue you. Just use your will to thank Him for the good things in your life anyway. 

Praise 

If you are able, sing praise to God. 

If you are so unwell that doing this makes you feel worse, then speak out some praise instead. 

Rejoice 

Rejoice in God. There are biblical commands to do this (Phil 2:17-18; 3:1; 4:4). And the Bible also has many examples of God’s people rejoicing in the midst of their sufferings. 

The prophet Habakkuk is a good case in point. He declared that he would rejoice in God even though outwardly everything looked disastrous (Hab 3:17-18). 

Importantly, the biblical instructions to rejoice are not about trying to make ourselves feel happy. Some Christians who are suffering badly look at the commands to rejoice and think these mean that a believer should always be able to choose to feel happy. Then they try to do this, it fails, and they feel even worse than before. 

What the commands to rejoice mean is simply that we should consciously choose to reflect on things in our lives that we are glad about. 

Spend some time thinking about these things. Even if you feel bad, it is quite OK to say to God something like: 

‘Lord, all things considered, I don’t enjoy my life at the moment. My sufferings are terrible. But I’m glad that I can pray to you. I’m glad that You are with me. I’m glad that x, y and z are true of my life.’ 

See other Christians 

Tell other Christians about your problems. Don’t let yourself get isolated. And don’t be embarrassed to ask for advice or prayer. Christians should be doing this constantly, whether going through hard times or not. 

Also try to get to church services and spend time with other believers. Having fellowship with others is very important. 

If you are too unwell to get to church services, don’t worry. That won’t stop God coming to rescue you. 

Try to fight demons 

The Bible teaches that every Christian will often come under direct personal attack from demons (Eph 6:10-18). Some of the negative thoughts or feelings that come upon you are probably the direct attack of these creatures against you. As far as you are able, fight off the demons that attack you. 

If you have trouble recognising attacks, be open to the possibility that a sudden bad feeling or negative thought might be a demonic attack. Try demanding repeatedly that any demon which is oppressing you leaves in Jesus’s name. 

If you find that you are not able to make much headway in spiritual warfare of this kind, don’t worry. That won’t stop God coming to rescue you. 

Be honest 

Be completely honest with God and with yourself about everything, even when the truth is unpleasant. 

Importantly, if you feel that you dislike God for not having helped you before now, admit that and tell Him. He won’t be shocked and He wants to hear it from you. Many Christians have felt this way before you. 

If you find that you dislike God, say something like this to Him: 

‘Lord, I don’t understand why you haven’t helped me before now. I know that You can’t have treated me badly, because You are perfect. Nevertheless, I can’t help feeling some dislike towards you. I’m sorry about that and I know I must be seeing things wrongly, but I do want to tell You how I feel. Please help me not to feel like this.’ 

Sleep, eat and exercise 

Try to get plenty of sleep and to eat enough nutritious food. And try to get some exercise too if that’s possible. If you can’t sleep much, eat much or exercise, don’t worry. That won’t stop God coming to rescue you. 

Take things easy 

Other than fighting against sin, don’t do anything difficult. 

If a soldier gets injured in battle, he is not expected to get back into front line duties until he is well enough. Similarly, if you are suffering badly, don’t force yourself to do anything hard unless you are sure that God is telling you to do it. 

If there are (morally acceptable) things you enjoy doing, spend plenty of time doing them if you are able. And don’t feel guilty about this. The time will come for you to get back into serious Christian service, but right now you are aiming to get better. 

Help others if possible 

Spend time helping other people, if you can do this without it making you feel worse. This is something that Christians should be doing a lot of if they are able. 

However, if you are so unwell that it makes you feel worse to help others, then don’t. 

If you are not able to help other people practically, try to spend at least a little time praying for others. Prayer is always one of the best ways of helping other people anyway. 

Think about others who have suffered 

Think about the fact that there are many other Christians who have been in a very similar situation to yours and have come out the other side. 

There have been several times in my own life when I have been hanging on by my fingernails. Probably the worst example was in 2012. There was a period in that year when I was suffering very badly, I lost a lot of weight and I was more or less housebound for several weeks. My tears were many and my prayers were agonised. And there were times when I doubted that God would rescue me and I didn’t know how I could go on. 

But then, as He had done before, He came and rescued me by greatly easing my distress. He heard my prayers and the prayers of faithful brothers and sisters who were interceding for me. He will do that for you too if you don’t give up. 

Never give up 

If you are a Christian who is suffering badly, then, I would encourage you to do the things I have listed. And keep on doing them until God answers your cries. 

As your heavenly Father, He loves you greatly and you can depend on Him totally. Never stop believing that He will help you, even if you find that your faith is mixed with doubt. 

Keep looking Him in the eye and saying, ‘Lord, help me’, and He will come to rescue you. 

 

See also: 

Are You an All-Weather or a Fair-Weather Christian? 

What to Do If You Feel Like Blaming God for Something 

Learning to Discern the Attacks of Evil Spirits 

Should Christians Forgive Those Who Are Unrepentant?